What is Self-Love?
Let us first understand what self-love is. Do we even understand the true meaning of self-love and its importance in our lives?
Since the day we are born into this world, we get overloaded with all sorts of different expectations. Expectations to be a good child, a good friend, a good spouse, a good individual, an efficient employee, and so on, trying to keep everyone happy around us.
However, have we ever thought about it while we are busy keeping everyone happy? Somewhere we keep losing a part of ourselves each day. When was the last time you looked into the mirror and smiled while looking at the mirror, winked, complimented yourself for looking gorgeous, or said — Hey, I Love You?
How many times have you tried to join a self-love program and then been unable to follow it properly, leading to no results from your efforts?
What is this self-love, by the way, for you? Is it overspending on shopping or gadgets or hanging out with friends you do not seem to enjoy anymore, but for the sake you go out with them?
Do You Remember Who You Are?
Self-love is nothing but loving oneself and accepting yourself the way God has created you. To be happy and content with yourself, you must take good enough care of yourself, which includes cleanliness, loving, caring, and pampering yourself by doing things you enjoy.
How To Go Forward With This?
Accepting oneself as created by the Creator is always the first step toward Self-Love. Embrace the goodness God has blessed you with. We are all unique and have a purpose on this Earth. The day we reach the age when we start getting all sorts of social and mental conditioning, we start accessing ourselves from the perspectives and judgments of other people.That is when we start ignoring ourselves, stopping loving ourselves, and looking for approval from others to quantify ourselves according to how others perceive us. However, it is never about how others see us. It is always about who we are and how we stick to reality.
The moment we start loving ourselves, we experience a positive shift. The more we love ourselves, the more confident, radiant, and happy we are. When self-love resides within you, the relationship with yourself and others automatically improves. You will feel young, lively, peaceful, joyful, and healthy.
When you love and care for yourself, your body will automatically release happy hormones, and you will feel joyful and content. Unless you love yourself, you cannot love others. Unless you are happy, you can never help others around you feel the same.
Recognize and Prioritize Your Needs —
When you love yourself, you will recognize and prioritize your needs and put yourself first and then others. However, people sometimes, due to their deep mental conditioning or guilt, might feel they are selfish, but believe me, they are not!
Be Assertive —
Learn to say No when you are unsure you would fulfill your commitment. Fake commitments or unrealistic promises always fail. Do not commit if you cannot conform.
Enjoy the Beauty of Self and the Freedom of Being True to Yourself and Be YOU —
You will be the person you are and aspire to be and not what others want you to be.
Identify Self-Love Boundaries —
You can identify what is good for you and what is not. Self-Love will teach you how you want and expect others to TREAT you. You will always know clearly what things are acceptable in your life and what is not.
Avoid Self-Sabotaging —
Avoid self-sabotaging thoughts and negative patterns in your life to improve the quality of your thoughts.
Stop Considering Yourself a Victim —
You will stop accessing yourself as a victim. Whatever situations or people surround you, you will stay more aligned to learning lessons and moving towards a brighter path in life and stop clinging to the past or judging the doings of others or how they perceive you. Remember, experiences are to refine and polish us as a person and a soul and do not define us.
Share Unconditional Love without feeling Drained or Empty within —
Is it possible to drink water from an empty glass? Or imagine you offering an empty glass to someone. What will happen?
It means if you do not have enough love within, what will you give to someone else, be it your friends, family, spouse, or the world?
You have to have enough love inside your heart and your whole self to share it with others without feeling drained out. Unless you have it, you will not be able to give it to others.
Stop looking for happiness outside and seek it within —
You will feel much happier within, with others, and will not seek joy in the outside world as your inner peace and joy will make you more contented within.
Self-love also means letting go of whatever does not serve you anymore or is hurting you from childhood or present memories. Allow it to release into the divine light; this makes you feel lighter, happier, and more peaceful inside. Spend some ME time with yourself because it is not always necessary to spend time with others.
Even if no one else does, you should love, pamper, reward, and pat yourself on the back for your accomplishments. If you feel memories from childhood or past experiences still haunt you, please visit an expert and heal your inner child. Release and heal your suppressed emotions, anger, or resentments that cause pain and self-judgments.
Working on your confidence can help you a lot, as this is what sabotages the self part the most.
How can you heal your inner child?
To heal and nourish your inner child, you may use the following loving statements for yourself:
I Love You
Say it whenever you see yourself in the mirror or window reflections. Say it anytime, anywhere you are comfortable. Initially, it may be difficult as we are mentally conditioned to love someone else, but with practice, you will hone this skill. Love is the key to healing. It is the only eternal truth of this universe, so never stop loving yourself.
I Hear You
Instead of suppressing the voice of your inner child, say — I hear you. We will work together through it. Everything will be okay.
You Deserve Better
A child is innocent and pure. A child deserves unconditional love, care, pampering, and assurance. Take care of your inner child because each of us has an inner child who needs to be cared for, nurtured, and shown some love.
I Am Sorry
There are times when you constantly feel stressed about not doing enough for yourself and others. You may criticize yourself for being incapable or simply wanting to rest. So tell your inner child you are sorry.
I Forgive You
One of the quickest ways to sabotage ourselves is to hold on to guilt, shame, and regret. Say to yourself — I forgive myself for anything I could have done better to make myself feel happier. I was only a kid, and like everyone, I am a human and can be imperfect. Nobody is perfect, and so I accept my faults in me.
Say thank you to yourself for always being with you and supporting you constantly, no matter what may have come your way. Thank your inner child for keeping you grounded in faith and hope.
You Put In Your Best Efforts
Pat yourself on the back and appreciate and enjoy your achievements, even if no one appreciates them. Believe in yourself and your talents, creativity, and abilities. Never lose hope. Keep supporting yourself all your life.
Even if you fail sometimes, Do not worry! Say to yourself — Better Luck Next Time! Re-analyze what went wrong and try again. You need not be Perfect.
Practice forgiveness for yourself and others. Let go of all unnecessary burdens holding you back.
Forget, forgive, and move on with life. Take your experiences as lessons and challenges, and keep moving forward.
Smile and thank the divine for always giving you another chance every day to complete your incomplete tasks and encourage you to continue on the path of life with better confidence and hope.
Love yourself till eternity because only then will you be able to give love to others unconditionally.
Continue to work on yourself, master yourself, and grow spiritually, emotionally, and mentally while feeding yourself love.
Remember, love is the only eternal truth in this universe! Do not lose yourself to keep everyone happy around you. The deeper and stronger relationship you share with yourself, the more you strengthen your relationship with everyone around you.
Fill your glass with self-love, and only then will you be able to serve it to others with no expectations in return. The more unconditionally you give it to others, the more it will come back to you amplified.
Love, light, peace, gratitude, and infinite blessings to all!