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Parenting - A Spiritual Approach (Part - 2)

Your words may be “I am not bias with both of my children, but are your actions matching your words and tone?” If not then stop lying to yourself and them also that you are not bias. Accept you are being biased just because one of them could not fulfill your desires as you expected to be.

So, what is that you get then, aggressive, abusive, inobedient and rebellious children with lack of love, empathy and respect for you while you grow old. So, your words, intentions, emotions behind your words and feelings make a huge impact on not only your own life, but for your children and rest family life too.

For you as an elderly, it may be a small thing or act, however, for Crystal and Indigo Children (most sensitive and emotional/empathetic to human behavior/energies), it may be more in terms of depth or impact than to yours.

You may have had been ignorant to energies, and had been more into earthly mind conditioning due to lack of awareness and self-realization or spiritual guidance, but these days the newer generation of souls coming into existence are metaphysically aware about their existence and yearn & long for acknowledgement of their preferences, emotions and freedom of making choices and not being judged based on them.

How would you feel if your children start judging you back? You would never want to hear from them you being a bad parent, right? Why? For God, everyone is on same level, then why not?
Let me answer here for you, because you have this conditioning from many lifetimes and generations that elders are meant to be respected (which is true, they must be). As a parent you have the right to choose what’s best for them or say anything to them, but here is the twist, you forget, they are your children, not non-living things which would not affect them no matter what you say or behave with them and they must accept it even if it is not right. But if you do something wrong in terms of behavior or biasness with your children, how many times you have identified it, realized it, accepted it and said sorry to your children?

So, now I know the first thought you will get here is, “Saying sorry to our children!?!” Big deal huh! So, now the real obstacle comes here, “Your Ego”. Ego of being superior, elder, a parent, more experienced, more knowledgeable, against the norms, traditions & values etc. etc. This “Ego” is the main cause of your pain. The cause of unhealthy, unloving and too stringent relationship with self and all around including your children.

So, what is that we can do to practice Spiritual Parenting? Below are some tips, you can start incorporating in your parenting or life, that will immediately bring positive shifts in your hurtful relationships with your children or can save the growing one for future:

Put aside your Ego - When you interact with your children, put aside your ego of being superior and more experienced than your kids, as it is not we who get experience, even a small child can be more intelligent and spiritually conscious than an adult with lots of other experiences, so don’t belittle them by ever expressing this thought or words or gestures that we are better than you and you know nothing. Remember - Shri Krishna was also a child and killed many demons during his childhood, so  it is not how old and powerful you are physically, it is about, how conscious you are mentally, emotionally and metaphysically too.

Let go of your Desires, Agendas and Expectations - Put aside your own desires, agendas and expectations allowing the divine plans and agendas for your children to unfold and be executed as per divine timing and their life purpose. These desires could be:
  • Desiring your children to be who we wish we could be or we wanted them to pursue what we could not in our times
  • Expecting our children to be clone or copy of ourselves
  • Forcing our children to do something or be like someone else to be socially-acceptable
  • Expecting and desiring too much from our children to be our trophies of fame, recognition and proud parents to bring relief to the pain or guilt we carry for our own incompetency and failures in from our times and experiences
  • Expecting your children to be an example of perfection and mannerism all the time
  • Expecting your children to always agree with your thought process, preferences, decisions and choices - not letting them choose and decide for themselves, stopping them indirectly from experiencing life and learning their own lessons
 Instead allow your children to be who they really are, show and express them that you value and encourage their truth and for being a unique soul in this universe, show them respect equally as an individual with different choices, thoughts, feelings, emotions and desires as you would do for your own self. Respect their decisions too, support them in their decisions with no judgements whether they succeed or not.

What else you can do to practice Spiritual Parenting:
  • Focus towards how you can help them be themselves
  • Honor and Nurture their spirituality - the courage, faith and connection to their own spiritual self will give them strength and confidence to choose and live with the divine guidance received
  • Help them how to identify and hone the connection with their spiritual self, this will help them follow their unique path more effortlessly and confidently
  • As a parent, you have to accept this reality that children are just not humans they come naturally and spiritually aligned, it is our mind conditioning after they grow up which imbalances their spiritual alignment and faith in spirituality by believing what we tell them and not what they must know about life spiritually
  • Invite your children to join you during your spiritual practices & help them understand the true beliefs but remember that the real purpose is to help them find what works best for them; this is why Buddhists follow this approach traditionally in their family and lineages
So, it is not that you and your family are spiritual so you will be 100% perfect in all that you do, you are still a soul in human body to live and learn your lessons, you may lose your temper, you may get disappointed with each other, you may disagree with each other also sometimes, but how we deal and overcome all these challenges and get back to normalcy and in a state of non-judgmental, divine pure/unconditional love is what matters and is the greatest savior of all relationships.

It is not wrong, insulting or to belittle you to having you genuinely apologize for what you have had hurt your children in past or present emotionally or mentally for. Forgiveness is not one way, it is a two way process for both sides of people and souls involved to help each other release the resentments, anger, emotions, and what does not serve our highest good and free each other from that cling cord of unattended wounds, emotions, disappointments, if you leave the wound open, it will get severe and may damage deeply. So, if you have wounded someone knowingly or unknowingly, intentionally or unintentionally no matter yourself, your spouse, your children or anyone, it is your core responsibility to dissolve that karma and hurt there and then by asking for and forgiving one for that hurt and release that painful cord of attachment not only for the betterment of that person, but your own self and that relationship to remain peaceful and in harmony. Forgiveness is the key to open doors to pure unconditional love.

By apologizing you are not apologizing to your children or someone younger, you are apologizing another soul by telling them you want peace with them and you realize your mistake that you have done wrong to them. By not asking for and forgiving others, you contract the possibilities of being in peace and harmony with your loved ones deepening the pain in their wounds, you never even knew that unintentionally you may have had given to them.

So, Spiritual Parenting not only gives a nurtured upbringing to our children but it makes us also an ego free soul & in divine alignment and in consent & agreement with the divine truth of all souls living here as humans for their individual journeys to go through.

Concluding with a loving statement here - We all are one, we all are children of God, the experiences and difficulties with each other gives us opportunities to strengthen our bonds and improving our understanding with each other & infuse the roots of deep unconditional love into our hearts and souls for each other.

Leave your children with memories they would love to recall and respect you for when you are not with them in human form anymore and not to express their agitation, hatred, resentment or curse your soul all life for the consequences they will be bearing and dealing with in absence of these loving memories.

Stop judging, being bias and un-acknowledging and become a proud parent by giving right nourishment not only to your own soul but also to the souls of your little angels (your children who will remain your angels no matter what age they are).

Love, Light, Peace, Gratitude and Lots of Blessing to all!!!!
We all are souls in human form; cherish this life to live it at fullest!!!

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